February 10th 2015 

One

It’s Valentines day again this year, like every bloody year. And it’s a Saturday! This reminds me of the song “One is the Loneliest Number”. But that makes two a couple, three a threesome, and everything else becomes a a more complicated orgy of numbers, where there must be some unpopular ones that get nothing.

This isn’t really the theme I had in my head before starting. I’m thinking of the concept of “one”. Examples of this can be, one apple, try anything once, one pint of beer, one night out, one tube of Pringles, one bar of chocolate, one packet of crisps, one packet of gourmet crisps, one bottle of whiskey.

One is one . This might sound stupid, but one tube of Pringles is there to be eaten. That’s if eat is the correct word. It suggests that the tube is full of food, which it isn’t.

Other examples could be one meal.  The whole point being is that quantity is important,  but not always apparent.

In the case of beer, for some reason the pint is the measure by which we drink. How may pints did you have last night? Errr four, or may be six. Ask the question of how many units were drank, and you’ll be lucky to get a reply. There are two reasons:

1. You just don’t know. How strong was the beer?

2. You might not want to know.

Units are measured in ones. But not physical ones.

On a more healthy note – one of your five a day. Great, I ate a grape. But how many grapes make a one? Then when does one start to count as a two, or can it? Then when does the one start to get so big it starts to be a minus one!

I’m trying to write one document. At least I try to stick to 400 words, so I know what “one” is. But that one may not be very good.

At the moment, I’m working myself through one bottle of wine. It would be half a bottle, but I’m running a very un-scientific study to see if this one bottle of sulphate free wine will make me feel bad in the morning and have one hangover.

I’m not really sure where I’m going with this. Perhaps one should be enough. But Mars Bars aren’t as big as they used to be. So, I end up having two, which is too much. But having halves of things seems like being indecisive, or uncommitted.

That’s my one document for the day!