I can’t believe I haven’t written this before. But first, if you ever have problems spelling believe there’s a lie in believe. What can you believe now?

Judo caused me much pain and injury in the end. Possibly, from the start too. I was shown all four corners of the dojo many times. Which in the end isn’t really very good for anyone. The really trick is to be the one dishing it out.

Over the years, I think I’ve become used to taking the knocks in life and not giving it out enough. This is a punch bag mentality, and I’m not the one doing the punching. It involves following and not leading. And there is merit in being able to keep going, but there is a limit. Enough is enough.

The pain in my neck and shoulder never let me forget where I got them from. And I’m sure I can feel some old bangs on the head. Somewhere however, there’s fight left in me. Sometimes you’re in the wrong dojo. You need a good coach. I may be a black belt, but black belts need coaches to. And there’s a routine, and so much to master. Mainly, though, it’s feeling fit and strong. So, I have to try to keep fit in case I decide to return.

Addiction is a strange thing. That’s why  used the word “Judoaholic”. Just because I miss something that I took part in for years doesn’t make it a good thing. My desired  outcomes are good things, but they aren’t going to happen. Doing it might not make me happy, and if it’s not making me happy, why do it if I don’t need to?

I do need to work, but I need to make a job which will make me happier. Life is too short not to do things that make us happy. Many people in the world don’t have that choice, and not doing it is irrational. However, irrational is what we are. Stop doing that!

What this comes down to is that I want to be fit, strong, and happy. There must be more, or I’m just dealing with the situation where I am and can’t move on.

These blogs aren’t funny yet!

Things are going to change. Small steps have taken me a long way. Then I can own up to myself what I really want from life. There’s time yet.