What happened? Yesterday was meant to be the start of a new me. A new motivated, organized me. Started 6th December 2019.

I never stop being amazed at the mess just one of me can create. This isn’t something I want, but there’s nothing I can do about it. This is a pattern of behaviour I can’t break. It only gets worse when I’m hit by on of my sleepy days. The time just passes and before I know it, I’m writting the same blog over and over again. Needless to say, this is not good. Something is very wrong.

I think that the best thing I can do is shoot off another 36 b&w exposures on the Retinette this weekend. The 66 might get a run out too. This is something that makes me feel that I’ve done something and reminds me that I have been somewhere and did exist. I’m pretty sure I’ve said this before too. The good news is that I’m not stuck anymore, but the bad news is that I’m going round in circles. What I need is that little extra energy that will give me excape velocity and fly off somewhere else.

11th January 2020 21:36 – Where am I now?

I’m happy to say that the photography is going well. Its going well for the company I use to develop my films too. This week I’ve been looking forward to two films and I might get them next week due to a Christmas backlog. On the plus side it seems that film cameras are still out there and being used. But all of this is a sideshow. Maybe some day I’ll do a slideshow.

Last week, I realised that I’d let myself slowly get out of shape. Part of me knew I was doing this, but I needed to draw a line in the sand and do some excercise. I even entered an off-road bike ride n March 1st. It’s one I’ve done before, but it was important to enter it. I’ve even fitted mudgaurds from my experience last year. Luckily my shape isn’t too bad, but it was at the start of the year. My lungs were a worry and I needed to do something. This is something I know how to deal with.

Now that I’m moving again, I’m feeling positive. I need to be positive. There’s no other choice. This time I’m mixing in other circles and have the chance the chance to break out, so I need to look my best for it. With a bit of luck, my brain will follow. Please let my brain follow! A brain age of 74 on my brain trainer is something I’ll ignore for now.

I can do this and I will do this. A false start means another start in the race, or another race.